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Before Korzybski, people thought that "everyone sees the sky like I do" and based their actions and thoughts upon this.
After Korzybski, a few people had a revelation when they saw that everyone's internal representations are DIFFERENT - that people are in fact, COMPLETELY INTRAPERSONAL.
This is because the human neurology doesn't experience and/or process "the world" directly, but by making a kind of holographic model of the world inside their own heads, and it is this INTRAPERSONAL world they are responding to, not the "real world", whatever that may be.
This holographic model of the world, this "map" of the world, this collection of internal representations is what people navigate by.
It is expressed in what they think, say and feel; how they act; what they believe in; what they wear, what they buy, and how they react to any given situation.
Every Person's internal representations, one at a time, and then collectively as big constructed models where all parts are supposed to fit together and work together as a global "world view" that represents reality well enough so a person can survive and thrive in all actual reality, is uncompromisingly intrapersonal, highly ideosyncratic, unique in every way.
To really understand that, and to get one's head around the fact that another person's internal representations are most likely wildly different from one's own, is THE BEGINNING of real, proper, successful attempts at human communication.
Here is where instead of hearing someone say that God has eleven tentacles, and jumping straight in with declarations HOW WRONG THAT IS, we become aware that we actually DO NOT KNOW what's going on with that person's internal representations. We do NOT know what their map of the world is, how they have come to that conclusion, WHY that is a piece of their map of the world.
This is the moment when instead of blindly charging in and acting blindly on one's own maps, on one's own internal representations, we STOP.
We STOP and we ask ourselves and the other person for more information.
In order to communicate with this person, we need to learn more about THEIR internal representations, about the components of their intrapersonal maps, what their holographic model of the real world is like.
- ONLY when we begin to be able to start to ask, "How does THEIR map work?" can we even begin to consider what we might say, how we might gesture, or what might be required here to get some form of actual communication occurring.
This is why I said that a basic understanding of internal representations being the Alpha & Omega of communication excellence is of the essence if you want to be understood, or ever want to understand another person at all and in the first place.
Now, a lot of people who might be interested in NLP, persuasion, seduction, hypnotism and so forth might think, "Well, I don't care what other people think. I just want them to do as I tell them!"
But here's the deal.
If you do not understand how people think and how they work, you can't change them.
You can shoot them in the head, sure. Then they're dead.
But that hasn't changed their minds, which is a much more satisfactory and fascinating endeavour.
Eliciting Internal Representations
So how do we find out more about a person's map of the world, their internal representations?
There are many ways to do that.
The more advanced ways involve watching, paying attention, feeling and using experience, but we'll leave those for now.
For beginners in NLP or any study of what really goes on inside different human beings, the first step is TO ASK QUESTIONS.
Think of an internal representation not in terms of isolated "pictures", "sounds", "feelings".
Think of internal representations in terms of a lucid dream, where everything is totally real, and all modalities of human thought and experience are present, all together, all at the same time, just the same as if you were walking down the street of a big city and you could feel the wind in your hair, on your face; the concrete beneath your shoes; the smell of the cars in the air; the noise of horns, people, traffic, sirens in the distance, the sight of colours, shapes, forms rushing by; the sensations of your body and how you feel on this day as you think about what you're thinking about ...
That is a conscious evocation of the "idea" of "city" or "being in a city".
For me.
For other people, this will be different.
It depends on what kind of events they've had which formed their inner maps, actually CREATED the original internal representations (see Events Psychology).
If we want to know what anyone actually "means" when they say "the city" we need to ASK THEM what the internal representation BEHIND THE WORD is FOR THEM.
"What do you mean when you say "city"? Can you describe what "city" sounds like, feels like, is all about FOR YOU?"
Ask 1,000 people, get 1,000 different answers.
Ask further, don't stop with, "Oh it's where big skyscrapers are ..."
Ask for details. "What do the skyscrapers look like? Where is this? What is the weather? When is this? What are you wearing? Why are you here? And why is it that every time you think of "city" you evoke THIS internal representation and not any other ...?"
When you add ANY LEVEL OF DETAIL into your enquiry about what the internal representation BEHIND THE WORDS a person is using actually mean, you will be absolutely amazed of how unique and different all these people really are - and that's even from the self same background and culture.
You start asking these questions in a global audience, and the tale of Babel comes to life with a vengeance.
People are constantly arguing about things because they use the same words but their internal representations are different, so no agreement can be had.
Words & Internal Representations.
Words are ONLY THE REFLECTIONS of the internal representations inside one single person.
- Words do not have a transpersonal truth; they do not exist at all until and unless a human being comes along and converts the word into an internal representation.
This is the big breakthrough moment from Korzybski - words are really nothing at all. As such, we should master them rather than the other way around; and when you reconnect the pathway between the internal representation and the words used to describe that, many a huge "AHA!" effect comes into being.
Here's a simple example.
A man and a woman arguing about whether to get married.
The woman wants to get married and can't understand why the man does not; the man doesn't want to get married and can't understand why she does.
Now ask them one at a time about their internal representations about marriage.
The woman starts going on about "the happiest day of a woman's life" with the bride in white and her prince charming and happiness ever after, which is not to be had BEFORE this event has happened.
The man starts talking about being imprisoned, unable to got to sports matches and drink with his friends, being forced to trade his sports car for a people carrier, having all his money taken away, hordes of screaming children jumping on his head when he comes home tired from work, and a horror that lasts till the end of his days, without joy, without freedom, pain everlasting, without hope ...
One sentence.
"Let's get married!"
Two internal representations.
You can see that until and unless the happy couple gets a hold of what "being married" actually means, and perhaps even DEFINE WHAT IT WILL MEAN FOR THEM as a co-operative endeavour, there will only be war, and there cannot be anything else.
But that's advanced stuff; let's stick with the basics here.
If you pay attention, you can already tell just by looking at the two of them that they have different internal representations about getting married, because one jumps up and smiles and laughs and claps in delight; whilst the other sinks down into themselves, sighs heavily, shakes their head and grimaces as though they were physically in pain.
Now what you need to really understand here, and OBSERVE in practice all around you, is that "get married" or "marriage" is not the exception, but the rule.
For fun, spend a few weeks really ENQUIRING INTO what people mean when they say the words they say.
"I hate Christmas!"
"Interesting. Tell me more about it. What does Christmas mean to you? What do you think of when you hear the word, "Christmas"?"
Using Internal Representations To Create Change
Once you know what the internal representation behind the "words" a person uses actually really are, the doors to change are flung wide open.
Let's take the example of the person who hates Christmas.
We have asked what their internal presentations of Christmas are, and we find this person stuck in a throng of frantic Christmas shoppers with their mother at one point, being pushed and shoved around, being overwhelmed by it all, and being terrified and not ever wanting to repeat the experience.
Jingle Bells was playing over the speakers in the mall, and the scent of mulled wine and pine was strong.
Now of course one way of changing the whole "attitude towards Christmas" in this person would be to engage in some activity to put this traumatic experience to rest, once and for all; then "Christmas" would become much more multidimensional and might even hold positive memories which together and across the years, would form a very complex and information rich map about Christmas and Christmas behaviours, feelings, tastes and sensations for this person.
But we don't have to go that far, not at all.
We can simply say to the person, "Can you imagine that other people have different experiences?"
We could ask them to consider how a person would feel about Christmas who loved it, and why they might love it, causing our person to take a different attitude of consciousness, to take a different point of view.
We might play NLP type word games with them and ask them in true Korzybskian fashion to rephrase themselves and instead of saying, "I hate Christmas!" to say, "I HATE what happened to my younger self during that Christmas rush in 1967."
The point is that if you understand internal representations and how they relate to the words a person speaks, you have all the leverage in the world to change people's maps, to insert new components, to connect up broken off bits that don't seem to fit; to expand their maps, to make them more useful, more userfriendly, more successful in navigating the real world.
Rapport, Intimacy and Internal Representations
There is one more of these Alpha & Omega aspects of understanding how internal representations work I'd like to mention.
Imagine for a moment if you told someone some thing, and instead of them arguing with you and trying to tell you what an idiot you are for believing that, or feeling like that, or having come to that conclusion, instead that person would ...
... show interest in what you just said.
... Ask for further refinements.
... Feed back their understanding of what you've been trying to communicate.
... Refine with your help more and more ...
... until ...
... and probably for the first time in your life ...
... you have the experience that ANOTHER PERSON ACTUALLY UNDERSTANDS YOU.
Wouldn't that be something?
Wouldn't that make you feel - grateful, amazed, happy to be with that person, inspired to do some more of that mysterious thing called "communication"?
Even if you don't believe it, you would.
You'd love it.
It's a real experience in rapport, one that is far, far too rare, even in the most romantic, intense, "committed" relationships.
Truly getting onto "the same page" with another person who isn't you or an invisible friend is a remarkable experience, a very healing experience, if you pardon that expression.
It is difficult to maintain the idea that "nobody cares, and nobody understands me" - even if it's happened only once in 45 years or more.
It's an amazing thing for both partners in that communication.
This is where real communication starts; and with practice, as you make your way from the Alpha towards the Omega of understanding and working with internal representations, you will see the merit in it, the advantages it gives you, and also how this really has an awful lot to do with your own path and your growth as a real human being just the same.
- Understanding your OWN internal representations and your OWN relationships between the words you use to think with and what's behind those words is also the Alpha and Omega of all personal development.
So and as always, PAY ATTENTION.
Pay attention to the words people say but don't stop there. Go further and find out what's behind the words, what the internal representations are.
Once you have a sense of that, and you become familiar with the territory of internal representations, you will find it much easier to use words to create internal representations in an order and sequence that these become EVENTS for the person/s you are dealing with.
But that's in the future.
For now, pay attention, ASK QUESTIONS, and learn more about INDIVIDUAL people who come across your path.
And yourself - of course.
Dr Silvia Hartman
Author, Events Psychology
December 2009
NLP Internal Representations: The Alpha & Omega Of Communication Excellence - © Dr S Hartmann 2009.
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